Little Deep Thoughts

Adversity is any unfavourable situation that is not conductive to realisation of ones goals. It is a situation that is seemingly out of our control, defy known solutions and seem to threaten our existence or survival, at least temporarily, leading to moments of anxiety, frustration, feelings of guilt, helplessness and sense of inadequacy. Following are some of the more specific situations. The details in each individual situations may however vary: 1. Loss of job or gainful employment. 2. Business failure. 3. Loss of income. 4. Separation from near and dear. 5. Prolonged illness. 6. Repeated rejections and failures. 7. Reduced income or excessive debts. 8. Relationship problems and conflicts. 9. Unfavourable circumstances or environment. 10. Conflict with Law or institutions. The coping strategies we usually evolve to deal with difficult situations are products of our individual awareness, past experiences, belief systems and the environment in which we live. In some socie...

The problems we face fall in one of the three areas: direct control (problems involving our own behaviour); indirect control (problems involving other people's behaviour); no control (problems we can do nothing about, such as our past or situational realities). The proactive approach puts the first step in the solution of all three kinds of problems within our present Circle of Influence. Direct control problems are solved by working on our habits. They are obviously within our Circle of Influence. These are the "Private Victories". Indirect control problems are solved by changing our methods of influence. These are the "Public Victories". Most people have only three or four of these methods in their repertoire, starting usually with reasoning, and, if that doesn't work, moving to flight or fight. How liberating it is to accept the idea that I can learn new methods of human influence instead of constantly trying to use old ineffective methods to ...